Posts Tagged ‘words that start with “v”’
VACATION
is one of The Viv’s faVorite words.
I would venture to say that it’s one of everyone’s faVorites.
Not just because it’s fun to say and that it starts with the letter ‘V’.
The attraction of the very word lies within the concept of VACATING her day-to-day-mind-numbing-hellish LIFE.
For The Viv, the mere idea of VACATING and ESCAPING that oft-wretched suckfest of a life for one, measly frickin’ week a year
happens to be the lifeblood, that magic elixir, that gets her through the other miserable 51 weeks.
The Viv
LIVES
for that single, precious, sustaining
semana
wherein she enjoys being
The Bon Vivant.
Oh!
To FLEE!
To…to…
Most days —
to…
ANYWHERE!
(including a well-padded maximum-security facility)
(with really good food)
But, for that single-precious-sustaining semana,
The Bon Viv chooses,
hands-down,
to be in
OCMD.
There simply is
NO OTHER
place
I’d rather be.
EVER.
In fact,
I want to
LIVE
and
DIE
there.
It is my DREAM to live in one o’ those quaint little cottages on the boardwalk (preferably somewhere between 6th and 16th streets),
to wake every day to the brown ocean slapping the man-made jetty, and to spend my lazy days on my cute little porch gawking the
vacationers in their Sunsations-seasonal-skankwear parading and/or making dunderhead decisions in driving various non-motorized
vehicles up and down the boards.
AAAHHHHHHHH….
As for dying in OCMD,
I, Sassy Viv,
do hereby decree
my desire
to be
cremated.
I wish for my leathery cadaver
to be
charred
on the Bull on the Beach fryers.
Then,
I want The Dingus
to put me into a lashed harness
(with 320 lb. twisted poly line, of course),
ram a sturdy spar and spreader
up my crispy ass,
and then launch
my charred carcass
in front of
The Kite Loft
to allow my CinderViv self
to scatter
across the boards and the beach.
Ideally,
my cremation will take place
on a day with a wind
that will carry my ashes
five blocks south
so that
Randy Hofman
can
incorporate
a little of
The Viv
into his Jesus sand sculptures.
That’s the closest to
Heaven
The Viv will get.
EVER.
Snickerfodder 